Thankful!

I think that the best way for me to start the New Year is (1) to be thankful for what 2008 has blessed me with and (2) to look forward to 2009 with so much faith and enthusiasm for the good things to come.

The past year has been a year of milestones for me and I must say, despite the huge roadblocks along the way, I still have so much to be thankful for.

• I’m thankful for the opportunity to work here in Singapore. My first six months have been very challenging, from adjusting to a totally new environment – to overcoming the learning curve related to my new job – to getting through being really, really homesick – to struggling to stay employed because of the global recession – to setting-up and starting a new life away from home. It really was “sink or swim” for me. Considering how easy life was for me back home, going through these things all at the same time really forced me to toughen-up. For that alone, I am thankful because we all need to do some growing-up sometime. It just so happened that the last quarter of 2008 was my turn to do that.
• I’m thankful for Erwin’s coming to Singapore. I sure know, it took a lot for him to do that. People from our previous company were quite surprised of him choosing Singapore over a Chicago onshore assignment. Not only that, he also gave-up law school. Given everything that he has given-up, I can only hope and pray for us to one day, look back and say that this Singapore decision is one of the best decisions we have ever made. It’s too early to tell what exactly is waiting for us here, but one thing is for sure, this change has made our relationship stronger and better than ever. For that alone, I am still very thankful.
• I’m thankful for the new friends/people in my life. Adjusting to a new environment would have been a lot tougher if not for the company of some new friends. It was so much easier for me to blend-in to my team because two of my teammates were Filipinos – Elyse and Almin. Coordination between my team and another project’s team was also not difficult because the other team’s lead developer was also a Filipino – Ate Loi. I’ve also met a couple of new lunch and coffee buddies – Maytee (Filipino) and Banya (Indian). I may somewhat be unlucky with some things in life, but meeting friends is definitely something that I’ve just always been lucky with. I am, again, thankful.
• I’m thankful for my old friends. It just means so much to me that my old friends are still there for me. An email, sms, or a Friendster note from them really makes my day. Given that Singapore is just something temporary, it’s good to know that home will still be home when I go back because I know that my old friends are still there and I still have people to come home to.
• I’m thankful for my family. Despite the distance, my family is still my primary source of strength and inspiration. It is still their words of encouragement and so much faith in me that help me made it through the tough times. I appreciate how they have always supported my every decision in life and how they never pressured me to do anything or to be anything. I will forever be thankful to them as I am the free-spirited person that I am today all because of them.

There are probably a hundred more things to be thankful of for the past year. These are, more or less, just the major ones. As for 2009 – I am, as always, just optimistically looking forward to the best things that life can offer.

Have a great 2009 y’all! All the best this year and always! And to all those who have shared their 2008 with me, THANK YOU! I am surely looking forward to more years of friendship and companionship with you! :)

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Breather

High CPU utilization and out of memory!?! There are too many things on my mind that like a computer, it just seems to hang sometimes. I’m leaving for Singapore on the 20th and there’s still a lot to organize – my company car loan, my resignation clearance, my luggage, my finances, my despedida meeting with friends, etc. etc. etc. There’s no enough space for my to do’s, but there sure is space for some anxiety and of course, sadness. In fact, I actually feel like my processor has allotted a lot of memory for those two things. I’m going to miss home. I guess from here on, I just need to constantly remind myself why I am doing this. Everything’s gonna be alright. This is a blessing. This isn’t a curse. And I know that the BIG MAN up there will give me the strength to make things happen. We’re in this together, totally in this together.

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Appreciating the People Around Me

Her personally-prepared hot coffee with pandesal placed beside my bed always help me start the day right. I am 26 years old and she still does that (among countless other thoughtful things) for me. I know I am not the best daughter one parent can have. That’s why I feel really blessed because despite my imperfections, I am being unconditionally loved by the best mother in the whole world –- my Nanay.

Nanay can’t do it all considering that she also has a lot of things lined-up for the day. Our Adela helps her with some things like preparing my packed lunch everyday. Adela has been with us for almost five years now and she’s leaving us soon. Mixed emotions. Sad because she won’t be with us anymore. Happy because it’s a very good move for her. She has decided to go home and continue schooling.

I’ve been dragging my self to work lately. The humidity and the heavy traffic to and from the office have been making me feel really stressed-out. His words of encouragement and companionship have been helping me hang-in there. Being the positive person that he is, Erwin’s optimistic attitude rubs-off on me. He completely “gets” me and my lately becoming constant bickering about work. I guess it’s really a plus that we’re both in IT.

In the office, I am revitalized by being around teammates who are proving to be very fun to be with. Special mention to Jo-an and Jeremy who are seated right beside me. Our short but frequent bashing sessions make the workplace less toxic and a lot more enjoyable. I have to admit I was a little anxious about fitting-in after being assigned onshore, but my new team (Enterprise Search Team) and the team (Accenture Research Team) that I left before have been nothing but warm ever since I came back.

I always look forward to coming home to my nephew’s excited, huge and welcoming smile -- a real energy-booster. Although he can be too much to handle at times (quite a tough job for my sister Jing), five year old Gio has been bringing a lot of cheers to the family. He’s a real blessing, a bundle of joy and a lot more.

I am guilty of not being that appreciative lately. I feel like my focus has been on the things that have been wearing me out. The world is indeed not perfect, but surprise, surprise… It isn’t totally full of imperfections as well! I guess it’s really just a matter of perspective. Right now, I am just plain thankful that I have been blessed with a lot of good people in my life.

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Finding that Balance

Here’s how a typical week goes for me –-

MONDAY - FRIDAY
· 6am – 12am – prepare for work >> go to work >> work, work, work >> go home from work
· 12am - 6am – sleep

SATURDAY
· 6am – 10am – extra (catch-up) sleep
· 10am – 4pm – watch TV, surf the net, and/or read something
· 4pm – 12am – malling (Time Zone, dinner, coffee, and/or movie)

SUNDAY
· 12am – 1am – watch TV
· 1am – 10am – sleep
· 10am – 11pm – stay at home (watch TV, surf the net, and/or read something)
· 11pm – 6am – sleep

So, do I still have that “work-life balance” that I’ve always wanted to keep? Well, looking at my schedule –- I think my weekends are fine, but my weekdays, obviously, need some work!

I really want “balance,” but sometimes, I just forget about it. I can’t say I don’t have control over things. That would just be an excuse. And I would know. Because I know that -- Yes, there are things that we can’t control like (1) how the sun rises in the morning and (2) how it goes down during the night. Those two things I can’t control, but what I do between those two events, I’m totally in control of.

You know how writing makes you help absorb things? It’s kind of similar to how creating “digests” helps law students remember the key points of a certain case. So, that’s what I’m doing now –- writing about the things that I should keep in mind to make sure that I get to keep that quite elusive “work-life balance.”

1. From the words of my current manager – “Yes, the company can be very demanding, but you don’t need to meet all of its demands.” With that, I guess, it’s okay to say “no” when you really feel that the water’s up to the neck already. You don’t want to drown, don’t you? Worried about getting a low performance rating? Okay, consistently getting an A+ rating is important. It can fast track your career. But somehow, someday, you’re going to feel tired and because you’re tired, you won’t enjoy work… And because you’re not enjoying work, you lose eight hours (or more) of happiness everyday. And because you’re not happy almost all the time, you quit your job. And when you quit your job, you don’t get to enjoy your exaggeratingly-hard-earned A+ rating and fast tracked career. The keyword here is “PHASING” (not “slacking” huh!).
   
   
2. From the words of another manager – “Know the difference between working hard and working smart.” Working hard is important, but it is not as important as working smart. I think this is pretty self-explanatory. You can get things done by working hard, but you can get the same things done in a significantly lesser amount of time IF you work smart.
   
   
3. Remember that there’s more to life than just work or career. “Successful” will never be one and the same as “happy.” So? Enjoy your lunch break (stop thinking about work for an hour), take a breather, value your health (make it non-negotiable), spend time (enough time) with your loved ones, have a quick chat with an officemate (he/she might just need a breather too), focus when you need to focus, work hard… no, work smart, and play hard… really play hard.
   

Words of wisdom from the more experienced people at work really come in handy all the time. Most managers in the company have already spent more than six years of their life working. They should know. By the way, that last item was from the words of “myself.” See? I know what I need to do. Most of the time, most people know what to do. In my case, I think I just need to be reminded every once in a while. So, note to self –- live a balanced life!

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Six Months and Some “Defining” Experiences

I’ve read somewhere before that everyone in their lifetime will go through several “defining” experiences. And for me, the past six months have been full of those things – “defining” experiences.

Six months ago, I had a talk with my project manager and I told her what my primary goal was at that moment. I wanted to be more financially sufficient mainly because I wanted to start extending some help to my family. I remember her asking me, “So, it’s savings over career right now?” and I said, “Yes.” I was holding a fairly significant role in Manila back then, but that didn’t stop me from leaving because I had my mind focused on something more important than just holding a highly visible position. Then, I left home to play the game plan. I’ve never lived on my own before and that’s probably why Nanay was quite worried about me leaving. I remember her asking me more than once, “Kaya mo ba?” and I consistently answered her with “Oo naman.” Home has always been my comfort zone. I remember always getting teary-eyed each time I talk to some friends about leaving them and my family for a work abroad. It was not easy, especially because I’m the type who is just so terrible with “goodbyes.”

For almost six months now, I’ve been away from my comfort zone and from everyone who has made that “zone” more than just “comfortable.” I’ve been blessed with very fun-loving and extremely supportive and loyal friends back home. I can go on and on just talking about them, but simply put – they (and my family, of course) are the reason why home will always be home. Luckily, I met some people and made some really good friends here too. Everyone has been great so far. I guess it really is “Pinoy nature” to develop a certain bond and really stick together when living in a foreign land. Well, it looks like leaving home was not 100 percent “goodbyes” after all. Several “hellos” were also made and I must say the stand-outs were “Hello new friends!” and “Hello new lessons-learned!” Yes, there were a lot of lessons-learned and the most significant one would probably be the importance of doing and sharing things with and for your loved ones. My point – everything will be meaningless if you don’t have someone to share it with.

Now, why do I consider these things my “defining” experiences? Simple… They are the bitter-sweet experiences that define, shape, and strengthen my values and goals in life. And because they also happen to instill a very good definition of what’s important and what’s not important to me, they are also the experiences that bring me closer to my dreams and the things that will really make me happy.

By the way, it was also six months ago when something really significant happened. Six months ago, for the very first time, I took a chance on someone and I have to say, that chance was indeed worth-taking! And I guess I can also say that event could be considered a “defining” moment too. Why? Because like what I’ve just said, defining experiences/moments – they bring you closer to the things that will really make you happy. So – HAPPY 6th MONTHSARY, HONEY! See you real soon! ;D

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Something New

I’M JUST TAKING A BREAK. A much needed one, I must say. I’ve been staring at an excel document full of numbers and graphs for hours now. Metrics. Website usage metrics to be more specific. It’s a monthly task that I don’t enjoy that much. Well, I can’t really say I don’t enjoy it at all. It’s one of those new things that were brought about by my new role. New things always excite me. I think life would be extremely boring without new experiences. Those experiences that allow you to go through something that you’ve never done before. I guess it’s because it’s always nice to surprise yourself when you end-up surviving steep learning curves.

TODAY MARKS MY SECOND MONTH HERE IN CHICAGO. I can still remember how terrible my first night was. I couldn’t sleep because of jet lag plus I didn’t know how to turn-off the lamp beside my bed, making it more difficult for me to sleep because the light was on. Funny how I couldn’t figure-out how to do such a simple thing, but I have the perfect excuse for that – I was in an “unfamiliar territory,” remember? :p Now, the “unfamiliar” is not that strange anymore. Aside from learning that the lamp in my bedroom has this tiny lever that I could use to turn its light on or off, I’ve learned a few more things. No, not just a few things… A lot of things. I’ve learned that cooking adobo or nilagang baboy is not that hard (it’s not very easy as well). I’ve learned that I can actually be in the office by 8 am sharp (if I really want to). I’ve learned that distance has its unique way of strengthening bonds (technology makes it possible). I’ve learned that relationships you choose to keep and nurture will grow no matter what (everything really is a decision). I’ve learned that I was right in believing that more than “where you are,” it’s “who you are with” that really counts (snow melts, seasons end, good sceneries will eventually lose its effect on you, but family and friends-- they are for keeps).

ENOUGH BREAK ALREADY. Time to go back to work and do what needs to be done. I’m hoping I could finish this “metrics task” today so that I could move on to something new tomorrow. Maybe something that I’ve never done before would come-up. Something that would surprise me. Something that would make me learn more.

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Counting my Blessings

It's overwhelming (in a good way)! Blessings are pouring in and I can’t thank God enough for all the wonderful gifts (the chance to finally be able to help my family being the most significant one). Although I was never the “religious” type, I’ve always tried my best to be “spiritual” and I’ve never stopped praying for things. I guess it’s true what they say – “when prayers go up, blessings come down” (a Yiddish proverb) and to add to that, it’s always good to “count blessings like children count stars” (from Life is for Living).

Speaking of blessings and wonderful gifts -- my friend, Cristina, has just given birth to a healthy baby boy!!! Congratulations Kris and Ipe! I think you two are one of the most blessed couples I’ve ever met. More power and God bless!

PS:
Ipe - Thanks for sending me pictures. Little Ipe is adorable!
Kris - I hope you get well soon. Take care!

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